Wise man?

am I? Today my reflections of the past months are still due for any sound verdict... Looking at my children, I feel I lost a battle...but not the war. Looking back on the past few weeks, flying in circles with Chinagirl I felt so much joy...but the end seams near and the verdict is probably sound....is it a Yes or No? Looking back, both main streams in current life are not compatible, I should focus on Koreaflyfisher acting as a wise man, casting his dry fly into a small stream, catching the happiness. Simultaneously, I should focus on Isabella, Carmen and Mees.... So I should regain the full energy of life. A wise man should not focus on flying circles at this time...but when I sleep and try to exclude the joy thoughts, turning my face to the wall, the wall turns into her face....Yes, the verdict is clear: I am a human being! whiwhawoewa, iets naisssssssssss

a love song for a lonely day.... to my Chinagirl.....

내 흉곽에 외로움의 지도 한장그려지는 날이면나는 그대에게 편지를 쓰네봄 여름 가을 겨울 편지를 쓰네갈비뼈에 철썩이는 외로움으로는그대 간절하다 새벽편지를 쓰고간에 들고나는 외로움으로는아직 그대 기다린다 저녁편지를 쓰네때론 비유법으로 혹은 직설법으로그대 사랑해 꽃도장을 찍은 뒤나는 그대에게 편지를 부치네비 오는 날은 비 오는 소리 편에바람 부는 날은 바람 부는 소리 편에아침에 부치고저녁에도 부치네아아 그때마다 누가 보냈을까이 세상 지나가는 기차표 한 장내 책상 위에 놓여 있네
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On days when loneliness etches its map across my heart.I write you a letter.Spring, summer, fall and winter I write you.With loneliness gnawing at my very bones.A letter of yearning for you I write.With loneliness lacerating my lungs,I write just to say how much I miss you.With loneliness assailing my liver,I write the evening through so you know I'm waiting.Sometimes in metaphors, or literally in an indicative mood,Sealed with a flowery stamp and an "I love you",I mail off to you these missives.On rainy days through the rushing water's drone,On windy days through the howl of the wind,One I dispatch in the morning, a second in the evening again.And each time, on my desk lies a single train ticketGood for passage through this life,Who could have sent it?

(ref: Chonghui Ko)

Revolution and bright new future

It's a while ago, so this is a revisit to my blog....

I admit, it's mesh.....but the judge was right! After 6 years of marriage and three kids, I decided to unplug the situation and pressed the restart button. Years of alcohol abuse, me and my wife drifted apart. On the end, she finally was hospitalised (a kind of B. Ford clinic) enforced by the Amsterdam Mayor. Unfortunately, my wife perceives this differenty and so we ended up in court. The judge decided to my favour; three kids and appartment are mine! Bravo!!!!

Next time more in depth info...